The girl did not go to kindergarten. She sat with her mother, grandmother, or a nanny. At home, in a familiar environment. Now she has gone to school. What awaits her? Differences from peers who have passed kindergarten will be. But not always bad. We tell about the pros, cons, and how to help your daughter adapt.

Pros: independence and attachment

Such girls are often more attached to their family. They value home comfort, respect their parents. They may be more persevering: there are many distracting factors in kindergarten, fewer at home. Often better developed speech, because they were spoken to one-on-one (not to 20 children). They may be more creative, as they were not "pushed" into kindergarten activities.

They do not catch mass infections (measles, ARVI) — their immune system may be stronger.

Cons: socialization

The main drawback is the inability to communicate with other children. The girl may not know the rules: how to make friends, how to ask for a toy, how to yield. She may be afraid of other children (especially aggressive ones). She may be egocentric: she is used to getting all the attention. In kindergarten, children learn to negotiate, wait in line, lose. A home child does not know this.

Difficulties in the group: she does not understand when she can speak, when she needs to be silent. She may be an outcast or, on the contrary, a leader.

Adaptation in school

The first half year or year will be difficult. The girl may cry in the morning, complain about animals, not want to go. This is normal. Parents need: to get acquainted with future classmates (on the playground). Play role-playing games "school", "store" where you need to communicate. Do not spare time for discussing school situations ("What would you do if..."). Praise for any attempts to make friends.

Important: do not pressure, do not demand "quickly make friends".

Speech and knowledge

Speech is often better in "home" children than in kindergarten children. But there may be problems with discipline: she is not used to sitting in class for 40 minutes, standing up when asked. She does not know how to raise her hand. She does not know how to wait for a break to talk. Parents need: to accustom to a routine (wake-up, lessons, sleep). Teach to listen to the teacher, do not interrupt. Patiently explain the rules.

If the girl does not know the letters — it's not scary, she will learn. Scary is if she cannot concentrate.

Self-esteem

In kindergarten, children often criticize each other, mock. A home child does not know this. His self-esteem may be unjustifiably high. Facing criticism at school (a failing grade, mockery), it may collapse. Parents need: to praise for effort, not for results. Explain that mistakes are normal. "No one can do everything at once". Do not shield from criticism completely, but discuss it.

Important: if the girl is bullied, teach her to respond: "It doesn't matter to me", "That's your opinion".

Emotional intelligence

In kindergarten, children learn to recognize other people's emotions (laughter, crying, anger). A home child may not understand why a classmate is angry. He may be offended without a reason. He may not know how to comfort a friend. Parents need: to discuss the feelings of characters from books, cartoons. Play "guess the emotion". Teach to name their own feelings: "I'm sad because...".

This will help to establish friendship.

Not going to kindergarten is not a sentence. Many successful people did not go. The main thing is parental support. Help your daughter master social skills, do not pressure, be patient. And she will grow up confident, sociable, happy.

Permanent link to this publication: